Blizzard Adventure

So, I get up this morning and go to work.  It’s snowing a little, but blowing off the road easily enough.  When I get out of work five hours later, it is to the worst driving conditions of the year.  Ridiculous bad.  Awful.  Atrocious.  And so I’ve decided not to leave my house until further notice.  But what to do with my time?  The weather guys are pretty elusive on when the blizzard-like conditions are going to let up, so I have a lot of time to fill.

snow-2

 

Pretty right?  WRONG.  Utterly horrifying more like.

So, we’ve been meaning to do a craft adventure for a while and I figure this is the perfect time for it.  Milli and I have decided some time ago that it is time for us to build a cardboard city, then dress up as monsters, and then destroy said city.  We got the idea from www.somethingpositive.net (around year 2010) out of the blue one day, and have been collecting cardboard ever since to save up for our own city.  The monster costumes may be beyond our ken, but we aim to try.

And that being said, I’m going to go take a nap instead.

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Day Eight!

Your usual host is back any day now!  I know I was bad yesterday, but they had me working a closing shift, followed by an opening shift, which was quite lame and taxing.  But good news!  I finally have time to blog!  Bad news, I have nothing to write about today!

Holy Cats

 

“This is totally the face you’d make if I had anything useful to say.  You can make it anyway to humor me.”

I think this weekend I will continue on my journey to make a Charmander (not mine, Nintendo’s) hoody!  I’ll let you know later if it doesn’t totally suck.

Day Six: Rainy Day Boxes

Finally a day off and all I can think about is more ways to not feel spectacularly spent after a stressful work week.  Yesterday I went for adventures, today I think I’d like to tackle Rainy Day Boxes.  What is a Rainy Day Box, I make you ask?  I’m so happy I forced you to inquire!

A Rainy Day Box is simply a box in which you place something that might make a friend or family member smile, then give it to them to help fend off the darkness of depression or even just to ease the pain of a particularly rough day/week/month/year/decade.  The box can be any size and house anything at all, as long as it’s personal and will bring that other person some delight.

So for example, say you have a friend who is dealing with chronic and prolonged depression.  Put something humorous or even, dare I say it?, touching in a box.  Then put that box in another box, mail it to yourself, then when it arrives, SMASH IT WITH A HAMMER!!!  Ahem!  What I mean to say is that you can then decorate the box (or if you used origami to make your own box, that part is covered) and/or write witty, pithy and pleasing things on the outside.  Then give the recipient the instructions:  Simply open when they feel like life has just kicked them at the junction between leg and torso, or if they feel like maybe they never want to leave the house again.  From there, when they finally sink low enough to open the box, you have already buoyed their spirits, and lifted their hopes!  Thus forestalling that 4:00 am drunken phone call we all know and love.

Drunk Lady

“That’s right, friend!  You needn’t be on the other end of this call with a little forethought, cunning, and human decency!”

That is why I, for one, enjoy both giving and receiving Rainy Day Boxes.  For everyone who knows that the darkest time is just before dawn, and it really sucks getting a weepy phone call just then.

Day Five: What Happened To Day Four?

Life did.  Life, and work.  I’ve been up to my eyeballs in random calls to come into work on my regularly scheduled days off.  I’m mildly disgruntled, but my paycheck rejoices.  More importantly, I’m feeling a little frazzled and low on energy.  Naturally it’s time for… AN ADVENTURE!!!

What kind of adventure, you ask?  It doesn’t really matter as long as it’s something new.  It occurs to me not everyone knows how to adventure like we do, so I thought I would go through a couple of our adventures for the unlearned, ignorant, or just plain new adventurer out there.

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Day Three: Retail Isn’t All Fun And Games

Sometimes it’s chalk-full of stupid as well.

I work at a cell phone kiosk that abuts an electronics section of a store, so we get all kinds.  The electronic associates and wireless associates hang out and together we have put together a list of some of the more… charming things customers have said.

Prerequisite information:  Both the electronic section and cell stand surround a jewelry counter.  We have an easy-to-spot, well-known uniform.  The only carriers we supply phones for in our location are ATT, Sprint and Verizon.  We have plastic dummy displays because someone somewhere doesn’t like having all their demo phones stolen (wuss).  We do have several live devices that have security devices.

Onward!

  • Asking about TV’s:  What’s the difference between 32″ and 40″ and don’t tell me 8″!
  • Reads my name tag:  Oh!  Connection Center!  Do you work in jewelry then?
  • Eyeing the phones:  So, you guys have a deal that starts in two weeks.  I want it now.
  • Stares at my vest:  Do you work here?
  • We are running an event that waives activation and upgrade fees:  If you are waiving activation and upgrade fees, what if I upgrade?
  • Reading a sign about water resistance:  How much is a meter?
  • Without any frame of reference:  Will this fit in my car?
  • Also with no frame of reference:  Will Sprint work in my house?
  • Looking concerned;  I saw an “on-line only” ad.  Do you have the item in store to look at?
  • Seriously:  How much is this at Best Buy?  Can you Google that?
  • Hands us a demo camera with a security device severed off it:  Your security system is broken.  This came right off in my hand!
  • Poking a dummy phone:  Your phones don’t work!
  • Customer waving a phone case at me:  This is a phone right?
  • Delighted customer:  On the Verizon plan, we’ll have enough unlimited minutes to use all month!
  • Customer talking to her mother:  This is the phone with the megapixels!
  • Setting off the iPhone alarms:  If this alarm goes off again, how do I turn it off?
  • Customer with a device that’s not working:  My phone has been giving me problems.  I was hoping when I came back to a higher altitude it would work right again.  It’s not!!!
  • Picking up some of the dummy phones:  It feels really good in my hands!
  • From a tremendously unappealing customer:  I wish you was my girlfriend to get me on a phone plan.
  • Customer flocking with friends to the electronics section:  This is the electronical stuff!

And that is all the ones that translated easily.  The others mostly only make sense to people who spend all their time in the store watching people do ridiculous things and say hideous stuff!

Day Two

Does anyone else have twin siblings?  I do.

Fun fact:  If you have twin siblings you may get drafted by your mother to participate in twin studies well into adulthood.  In fact, they still contact us from time to time.  It’s kind of insane, really.

When I was little they would put us through a series of logic tests, math tests, and lingual tests.  Then they would ask a series of really AWKWARD questions.  Usually about if we abused drugs, if anyone touched us, what we think of our siblings and other such foo-fah.  They would compare all three of our results, give us a lolly and send us on our way.

As we got older the cool and fun parts diminished and eventually they just asked even more questions about our mental health (suicidal thoughts, depression and others) and gave us $100 each.

The moral of this story is that if you want $100 several years down the road, have twin siblings.  Also, I don’t always have a point.